Monday, 26 July 2010
I remember the exact moment my cousin dared me to start a blog. We were sitting around the dining table and I was passionately speaking about a topic no one else seemed to care about. Though my family are accustomed to hearing my views, it doesn’t mean they like hearing them. Therefore when my cousin suggested I write my views down for public consumption, he didn’t want me to tap into an undiscovered gift. It had more to with him searching for something to keep my mouth occupied.
However I don’t think either of us thought two years later this blog would still be keeping my mouth (kinda) occupied. If you’d told me back then that I’d be still be writing now, I wouldn’t have believed you. Simply because:
a) I tend to start things off with great enthusiasm then quit.
b) I knew I had a lot to say but I didn’t think I had this much to say.
c) I thought blogging was for sad people (ironically I’ve joined the ‘sad’ contingent I once mocked).
Yet much to my surprise I’ve managed to clutter the blogsphere with 300 posts.
Initially the blog lacked focus and direction because I didn’t think anyone was reading. I didn’t think anyone would read because I didn’t think I could write. One parents evening my A-level English teacher told my father I was ‘an average student, with sloppy syntax,who lacks the ability to communicate with clarity’. I remember crying in the car on the way home. Not because she’d informed me in a polite yet condescending manner that I couldn’t write. I cried because she predicted me a ‘C’ and I was at an all girls grammar school where ‘C’ was the official banner of mediocrity.
Sidebar: I suspect the examiner who marked my exam paper was quite familiar with hieroglyphics. He/she managed to decode my atrocious handwriting and I miraculously got an A : )
That experience means I’ve never written this blog as a ‘writer’ or someone who has confidence in her ability. The self-assuredness people presume I have is nothing more than a mixture of fearlessness and the knowledge I have nothing to lose. Irrespective of what people think (or tell me) I still don’t think I can write. This is a space where I’m learning how to write and you’re all kind enough to entertain my test runs!
Prior to my car accident I had decided that my 300th blog post would be my last. Due to a variety of reasons, this blog had become a burden rather than a source of release. Yet in the dark time after my accident, I couldn’t wait to get back to blogging. Suddenly the prospect of writing thrice a week became cathartic. It’s a shame it took an accident to rejuvenate me but if that’s the one good thing to come out of such a disaster, then so be it.
A few of you have been reading since my first post (which was a rant if there ever was one) and many of you have come on board recently. I also get a lot of emails/Facebook messages telling me to keep writing and I often receive them when I feel like doing the opposite. Thank you all!
I’d especially like to thank my little sister Odo/Joy/Joi/whatever the heck you call yourself this week, without whom there’d be no blog. She’s like a ghostwriter who doesn’t write. Love you sweetheart!
In terms of this blog and the future there’s a lot more to come. I’m just getting started. Everyday I seek to improve myself. Whether it’s as a daughter, sister, friend, human being or a ‘change agent’. Hopefully my longing to improve will become evident in my writing. Thank you for joining me on my journey thus far and I look forward to spending the next 300 posts with you.
Love & Light
P.S I’m going to get in trouble for missing someone out but I’d like to thank the following people who have said or done something that's stuck in my mind and kept me blogging. Tobi, Hamida, Kelechi, Akachi, Nii, Gavin, Alani, Wale, Wende, Yvonne,Ben,Vanessa, Ibrahim, Sayo, Femi, Aunty Pru, Rolake, Sumz, Mayne, Timz, Karen and Rachael (Odo’s friend). Love to all of you!