Monday, 2 March 2009

Good Girls Gone Bad

There are many guarantees in life.

Death. Taxes. Being visually assaulted by a woman with an irresponsible weave.

And women going back to men that treat them like crap.

According to ‘sources” Rihanna has gone back to Chris Brown three weeks after he allegedly beat her up with an umbrella (he didn't but I just think it would be a hilarious inappropriate twist in this tiresome story). Now I’m not going to say ‘I told you so’ but I did, and if you don’t remember click here. Therefore I'm not going to rant about Rihanna’s questionable judgment. I’m fully aware that "love" or the belief that one is in love, can lead people to do things they ordinarily wouldn't. So if Chris and Rihanna decide to bite, scratch and kick their way to happiness, let them do their thing .If all fails I'm sure they can get a Street Fighter endorsement.

So! Since speaking about Chrihanna gate is the thing to be done, I’m going to analyse this over-saturated story from another angle and attempt to extrapolate a lesson that will hopefully help us teach the kids that umbrella’s are not weapons.

The legendary Sean Carter wrote:

"The say you can't turn a bad girl good but when a good girl goes bad she's gone forever"
Sean Carter, The Blueprint.

Now when most good girls go bad, unlike Rihanna it’s not because they got a haircut, wore edgy clothes and started making decent music (in my books that’s called growing up), good girls generally go bad because of one of three things.

a) They fall in love with the wrong man
b) They get bored of being good
c) They make friends with lost souls who catalyze a and b

I know my reasons seem like clich├ęs, but contrary to what Fox News would have us all believe good girls don’t go bad because they watched too many Hip-Hop music videos. Any good girl that went bad because of Hip-Hop was a lost cause long before being instructed to ‘shake your ass but watch yourself”.

To be completely frank, I only care when good girls go bad, start gestating like rabbits, choose not to work, produce offspring that become machete toting feral children, all at the taxpayers expense. However even this breed of good girl gone bad isn’t irredeemable!

You see although I’m cynical about people’s ability (rather than capacity) to change I disagree with the idea that when a ‘good girl goes bad she’s gone forever’. The reason being that most good girls that go bad, snap out of the phase after approximately 2-4 years and 450 scandalous incidents that mean that their social circle has relegated them to being a citizen of Hoeville.

Unfortunately other people are unwilling to recognize they’ve changed because once a woman deviates from the norm and does things that if a man did no one would blink, the reputation sticks. She could join a nunnery, win the Nobel peace prize and finally manage to make wearing velour a criminal offence but she’ll forever be labeled as ‘that girl that did the freaky thing with a horse and a cup’.

There’s this massive double standard in our society that means you can’t " turn a hoe into a housewife" but a man can behave in a seedy manner for years and the general consensus will be “he’s getting it out of his system”. And when he eventually decides to settle down, all his prior misdeeds are magically deleted from our memories.

I must sound like a mad feminist. I can assure you I’m not. Well not the feminist part anyway!*I just feel that women have to constantly conform to ideals that are often impossible to attain and men don’t have to deal with.

Or have I got it completely wrong? Are there some things that are ok for men to do and inappropriate for women? And are good girls gone bad, really gone forever?

What say you?

Peace, Love and Cannon


* I’m actually an anti-feminist feminist…. (It’s a long story).


  1. I was previously of the opinion that once a good girl goes bad, she’s gone forever but I no longer think so. That’s because I’ve seen someone I was once really close too, go from good to hoe and is now trying to be good once more. Also I found out not to long ago that one of my aunties and her sisters (not a blood relation – I mean ‘Aunty’ in the African sense lol) used to be hoes back in Nigeria!

    She’s always on her high horse because my parent’s don’t mind me going out or having a bf. She is under the impression that because they all live in the UK now people have forgotten her previous indiscretions but oh how misguided she is… now every time I see her and her hating self all I can do is laugh and wonder if her daughters know?! But I digress…

    The guys who know what my ‘friend’ got up too during her ‘wild’ stage call her all sorts of names but these same men (2 in particular) have slept with no less than 150 girls between them – many of which we’re aware of. But no one calls them names or refers to them as hoars – which in all fairness they are.

    Misogynistic ideals directed towards those who chose to be ‘sexually free/generous’ as opposed to being virginal and seen but not heard (albeit an accidental or misguided decision at times) needs to be curbed. Misandry seem to be an emotion only felt by feminist and women scorned but is it really fair that this double standard is allowed to continue?

    I totally agree with the three things that usually turn a good girl bad and like you, hate it when “good girls go bad, start gestating like rabbits, choose not to work, produce offspring that become machete toting feral children, all at the taxpayers expense!”

    Please keep the insightfully witty rants coming! :)

  2. I think you're right, it's all down to stereotyping. The girls with a bad rep thing sticks really easily,so women should always be on their awares. It's not fair but it's something women have to deal with and I doubt that'll ever change.

  3. You make so really good points. Women have to live to a completely different set of standards. I think maybe people think good girls go bad "forever" because the bad girls give up trying to be good again, knowing that people won't spot the changes!

  4. I actually agree with everything written! Super Star Sumz, your analysis is flawless! Thanks for the support xxx

  5. you are sooooooooooooo stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. Yeah, i reckon you're right about the double standards to an extent. But i don't think that these things stick with girls as long as you think. I've seen plenty of bad girls go good and i think people these days see that it's more of a phase of growing up than anything else.

    I love that Jay Z song by the way!